Fifteen years ago Kate Summers secretly adopted a precious baby boy that helped her heal from the tragic death of her husband and daughter. Now Kate’s world is rocked again when a wealthy family fights her for the son she vows she’ll never surrender. In desperation, Kate turns to the only man she can trust, but sensual and dangerous Daegan O’Rourke has his own past to hide — and a past with shocking ties to Kate’s.

Praise for WISHES

“Provocative prose, an irresistible plot and finely crafted characters make up Jackson’s latest contemporary sizzler.”
— Publishers Weekly

WISHES is “a wonderful book.”
— Rendezvous

“Lisa Jackson turns out another sure-fire winner with this engrossing tale.”
— Romantic Times

Publish Date

September 1999






Boston, Massachusetts


Kate Summers rolled the last page from her word processor and dropped it with the others in her OUT basket. Now for the hard part—saying goodbye and making a quick exit. She glanced at the pebbled-glass door to Tyrell Clark’s office. His desk lamp shined through the opaque barrier.

Get a grip, Kate. You can do this.

She’d agreed to work late, hoping that he wouldn’t return, but she hadn’t been so lucky. She’d heard his heavy tread on the back stairs just forty minutes before and though he hadn’t paused at her desk, hadn’t so much as glanced in her direction as he’d beelined to his office, she knew she couldn’t leave without collecting her last paycheck and a letter of recommendation.

The rest of the building was quiet. Only the soft rumble of the building’s tired furnace and the muted sounds of traffic outside disturbed the silence in the once-hallowed halls of Clark & Clark. The elder Clark, Tyrell senior, had died just two years before and now there was only his son to carry on the tradition. In the meantime business was shrinking. The suite of once eight offices now consisted of just two. Tyrell, a brilliant lawyer, also loved women, drink, and a friendly, if fatal, wager at the race track. And he had not only the IRS after him but other, more sinister adversaries—loan sharks and bookies and the like.

In two days Kate planned to leave Boston and the nightmare she’d been living forever. She’d never have to set foot in the offices of Clark & Clark again. All she had to do was ship her meager belongings to Seattle and hand her keys over to the landlord of her small apartment—four tiny rooms that had been her home for the past three years. A lump filled her throat, but she ignored it.

No more memories. No more pretending. A new start. That’s what she needed.


She sucked in her breath.

From the adjoining office, Tyrell Clark’s voice, smooth as well-oiled machinery, caused a chill to creep up her spine. She hated that well-modulated, nearly patronizing tone.

“No more,” she whispered under her breath and one of her hands curled into a tight fist. She didn’t have to put up with his advances—gentle touches and suggestive innuendos—a second longer. She found her coffee cup, favorite pen, address book, and dropped them all into her over-sized bag.

“Before you leave I’ve got something I want to discuss with you.”

The light in his adjoining office snapped off. Her stomach knotted in apprehension.

Now what? Bracing herself, she glanced at the clock. Nearly seven. And she was alone with him. The building was probably empty. Nervously she looked out the single window in the reception area, through the trails of rain that drizzled down the glass. Outside it was dark except for the illumination from street lamps and flash of headlights from cars as they passed. She’d been a fool to stick around after Ava had gone home for the day, but she’d needed the money the overtime would bring, had naively thought that Tyrell wouldn’t return from his late afternoon meeting with a client. She’d been wrong. Stupid, stupid girl.

He scraped back his chair and it squeaked as he stood. His familiar tread followed.

Just a few more minutes. You can handle it, Kate. Whatever you do, don’t blow it; you need his letter of recommendation so you can get another job in Seattle.

She managed a thin, watery smile as he approached her L-shaped desk. Fake it, she told herself, though her palms began to sweat. Be friendly, but firm. She resisted the urge to wipe her suddenly moist hands on her skirt. A few more minutes, then you’ll never have to see him or put up with his harassment again. Just hang in there.

Tyrell was an imposing man and a cliché of the highest order. Tall, dark, and handsome, he’d been compared to Clark Gable’s Rhett Butler time and time again. He made a point to see that his tie was never askew, his dark hair always in place, his three-piece suits without so much as a thread of lint or wrinkle to detract from his polished image.

Except lately. He’d been slipping. His shoes weren’t always shined to a high gloss, a few gray hairs had dared invade his temples and lines of worry had collected near the corners of his mouth. But it was his eyes that had changed dramatically. Usually full of a mischievous light, they’d dimmed with worry and he was forever playing with the wristband of his watch, as if he were running out of time. She knew why. The continuous correspondence from the IRS explained it all.

“So this is goodbye,” he said.

“Yes.” She reached for her purse. “I was just getting ready to call it a day.” Her mind was spinning ahead, creating an excuse to flee the building.

“I thought we might have one last drink together.”

“Sorry.” Not really. “I told Laura I’d stop by. I’m already late.”

“Your sister will understand.” He picked up her favorite paperweight—a crystal porcupine—and tossed it lightly, as if testing its weight. “This is important.” He offered her an infectious smile that had worked its magic on dozens of women with weaker hearts and landed them in his bed. The sorcery hadn’t affected Kate. She wasn’t interested in a man, any man, and especially not one as well-worn as Tyrell. And now his grin seemed forced, his usually tanned skin, paler, as if the life were being sucked out of him.

“What?” Her damned curiosity always got the better of her.

“I thought you might like to be a mother again.”

She felt as if the floor had just dropped out from under her feet. “A mother?” she repeated, her voice a whisper. Her head began to pound. She’d never known him to be so outwardly cruel. “If this is some kind of joke—”

“It’s not.”

She could barely breathe, hardly hear above the dull roar in her ears.

“I’m offering you a son. No strings attached. Well, not many.” Easing his hip onto the edge of her desk, he clasped his hands around one knee and stared at her with dark, knowing eyes. The tic beneath his eye kept up its steady rhythm.

“I don’t understand,” she replied, trying to calm down.

“It’s a long story and one I’m not privileged to discuss in too many details, but I have a client, an important, socially prominent client, whose daughter just had a baby—a little boy—out of wedlock. He was born this afternoon.”

“You—you want me to adopt him?”

He hesitated, his eyebrows drawing together. “Not just adopt him, Kate. I want you to take him with you to Seattle and pretend that he’s yours. The child’s white, his hair dark, and he could certainly pass as yours.”

“What? Wait a minute—”

“Just hear me out, Kate,” he insisted and the roar in her ears became louder. He reached into the inside pocket of his suit jacket and withdrew an envelope. From within, he found a Polaroid snapshot which he handed to her. The picture was of a newborn infant, still red, eyes out of focus as the camera had flashed. Little fists were coiled and his expression was one of shock at being brought into the harsh lights of the real world.

“Oh, God,” she whispered.

“I thought you wanted another child.”

“I do, but . . .” There was nothing—nothing—she’d love more than a child. But the idea was impossible. A pipe dream. You had your chance, she reminded herself grimly before the tears could come again.

“Are you serious?” she asked.


A small drop of hope slid into her heart.

“I don’t understand.” This conversation was moving too fast. Way too fast. “You want me to adopt him?” She felt as if she had cobwebs in her mind that were slowing down her comprehension, as if she couldn’t quite keep up with the discussion. “What’s the catch?”

“The catch,” he repeated under his breath and bit his lower lip. “Unfortunately, there is one.”

“Always is.” Trepidation chased away that little bit of hope.

“I prefer to think of it as a condition that comes with this kind of instant motherhood.”

Motherhood. The sound of the word brought back images of her own mother and a small farm in Iowa. Spring flowers, the scent of mown hay, and cinnamon lacing the air from Anna Rudisill’s prize-winning apple pies. Her mother’s kind smile or razor-sharp tongue when one of her daughters dared take the name of the Lord in vain whispered through Kate’s mind. Summers had been full of hard work and long days, nights staring up at a wide dark sky sprinkled with millions of stars. The winters had been fierce, frigid, and brutal as well as gorgeous with the thick blanket of snow that crunched under Kate’s boots as she trudged through the drifts to the barn holding onto her mother’s hand. Icicles had hung from the eaves of the barn and even the moisture collecting on the flat snouts of the cattle had sparkled in the pale winter sunlight.

From those few glorious years, Kate’s mind spun ahead as it always did, past the unhappy and horrifying part of her childhood to her short-lived marriage and her own darling baby girl. Erin. Sweet, sweet baby. If only her precious daughter had lived! Guilt squeezed Kate’s heart in its cruel, unforgiving fist. She blinked and found Tyrell still balanced on the desk’s corner, that pulse beneath his eye jumping.

“Why?” she finally asked. “Whose baby is this?”

“I can’t say, but the mother doesn’t want him—she’s broken up with the father and the family just wants to get the whole unhappy incident behind them. They don’t want any publicity, any hint of a scandal and so far they’ve managed to keep the pregnancy a secret. Now, all they have to do is make sure the baby is brought up by someone who will keep their secret and love the little boy as her own.”

“But I’m single . . . I don’t have a lot of money and there are hundreds of couples anxious to . . .” Something was wrong here. Very wrong. She glanced at the picture again and already this precious child, this unwanted and unloved baby, was starting to attach himself to her. “What about the father?”

“Bad news.”

“He doesn’t know?”

Tyrell shook his head. “The family doesn’t want him to ever find out.”

“But he has rights—”

“He’s in prison.”

“Oh, God.”

Tyrell’s lips flattened together and he set the paperweight back on the desk. “The guy’s bad news—someone my client’s daughter hung around with just to rebel against her folks. He’s into drugs, leather, chains, motorcycles, and crime; everything my client abhors. The guy also has a history of violence—serious, domestic violence. There’s a rumor floating around that he already had a son who died suspiciously as an infant. The police couldn’t prove that he was the reason the kid quit breathing, but they suspect him. My client doesn’t want anything like that to happen to his grandchild. Right now the kid’s safe as the father is locked up for assault, so he’s out of the picture right now. Won’t be paroled for a few years. Believe it or not, the family wants what’s best for the baby.”

“As long as he doesn’t inconvenience them.”

“If you don’t want to do this, Kate—”

“No!” she said so vehemently she surprised herself. It’s not the baby’s fault that he or she isn’t wanted, is considered nothing more than a nuisance.

Kate felt sick inside but the first little glimmer of what he was suggesting tugged at her heart. Could she? Could she take this child and pretend that he was hers?

A baby. A newborn. Her own child. A mother again.

Tyrell tugged on his tie.

“You know, Tyrell, this just sounds like trouble. Big trouble.” But there’s a baby involved, a baby who needs a mother, a child whom you need to care for. “The pregnant girl should tell her folks to take their Machiavellian opinions about children being born out of wedlock and shove them. That child belongs with his mother!”

“It’s not that simple,” Tyrell said, the patience in his voice belied by the lines of tension near the corners of his mouth. “The baby’s mother . . . she’s not well either, or at the least stable. She’s been in and out of mental hospitals for depression; always on some kind of medication, though the doctors have assured everyone that the baby’s healthy. The girl’s been monitored ever since she found out about the pregnancy. It’s been decided that the best thing would be for the baby to be adopted privately to someone who lives out of state. You’re moving to the west coast and since you lost your own family, I thought it would only make sense . . .” He let the thought trail off, leaving it to be finished by her own imagination, attempting to persuade her that he was only trying to help. She didn’t buy it.

“As I said, the deal would be that you would claim the baby was yours—we’d even manage to make the birth certificate say as much.”


“When you have money, anything’s possible. My client has money, lots of it. And influence. It’s not that difficult to get a phony birth certificate and you’ll be moving so far away that no one will ever guess the truth.” He glanced pointedly down at the pictures resting on the corner of Kate’s desk, then picked up a framed photograph of Kate holding Erin as an infant. Her husband Jim was standing beside them, ever the proud father. Jim was smiling widely, his arm around Kate’s shoulders, her own eyes shining with pride and happiness. The perfect family. How long ago it seemed.

Kate’s heart tugged and tears clogged her throat, tears she needed to hide. Oh, God, could she go through with this? Could she not? She knew she should leave, right now, before he reeled her in and she became a part of something corrupt, something darker than it appeared on the surface. Something she wanted. Standing, she slung the strap of her purse over her shoulder. “I think I’d better go. Laura’s waiting for me—”

Setting the picture back in its resting place on the desk, Tyrell straightened, then walked slowly around the desk to stand behind her. Gently, he placed his hands on her shoulders.

She shifted away, turned and glared at him. “Don’t.”

“I know how hard it was for you to lose Jim and Erin,” Tyrell said kindly. “You . . . well you’ve never been the same. I thought that this might be a godsend to you, to give you new purpose, a child. But if you’d rather pass—”

“No!” she blurted, though her rational mind told her to walk out the door, to stay as far as possible from Tyrell and his unethical scheme. This was crazy. Ludicrous! Impossible! Illegal, for crying out loud! And yet despite all her well-laid arguments, she couldn’t let this opportunity slip through her empty fingers. A baby! Her baby! “I—I don’t know what to say, I mean, I’d have to know more. How do I know this baby isn’t kidnapped?”

His face muscles relaxed. He knew he had her and she felt incredibly weak and manipulated. “Trust me, Kate. We’re talking about a newborn who isn’t wanted, who needs a mother, who deserves to be loved. He’ll have to be hidden far away so that his psycho of a father never finds him. This is an opportunity for you to be a mother again—an opportunity that may never happen otherwise.”

She blinked against a sudden wash of hot tears. For the past two years she’d felt an overwhelming sense of guilt and remorse for the deaths of the two people closest to her; maybe this was a chance to make it up; or maybe it was God’s way of giving her a reason to live.

“Okay, so it’s decision time. What’ll it be? Have we got a deal?”

“I need time to think.”

“There is no time.” He sighed heavily. “You know, Katie, I thought this would make you happy.”

“It . . . it would.”

“So you’ll do it?”

She hesitated only a second. Inside she was shaking. “Yes.”

“Good.” He hesitated, tugging at his lower lip. “There is one other thing, Kate.”

She braced herself. “What’s that?”

“You know how much I think of you, how . . . well, how I’ve tried to get close to you.”

She closed her eyes for an instant. “I don’t want to hear this.”

“Even before Jim was killed.”

“I know, Tyrell.” She stepped away from him, the back of her calves brushing up against the seat of her secretarial chair.

“And I wasn’t as much of a gentleman as I should have been.” He ran a hand through his hair, as if he were embarrassed. “I feel badly about it, really. I’d like to make it up to you.”

“By what? Allowing me this adoption?”

“Not adoption. Remember that. This child is your own flesh and blood.” He stared at her long and hard, as if silently assessing her mettle, determining if she was up to the role she’d have to play. “God, you’re beautiful.”

She swallowed hard.

“You know, I think I’m half in love with you. Can you imagine that? Me—a confirmed bachelor. Anyway, I would have done anything for you, Kate. Anything. After Jim died I thought I could help you get over him, that we could get together.”

“It . . . it could never happen,” she said firmly.

He stared at her a long minute and, as if he finally understood that she wouldn’t change her mind, he let out a sigh. “Yes, well, I figured as much, but I thought it was worth at least saying aloud.” Clearing his throat, he walked to the window and stared outside. The reflection from a stoplight flashed red against his skin. “Well, now that I’ve thoroughly embarrassed myself, I suppose we should get down to business.”

She waited, watching the play of emotions cross his face. He looked cornered and defeated, but she had to remind herself that Tyrell Clark was like a cat with his proverbial nine lives. No matter what, he always landed on his feet. She’d seen it time and time again.

“I’ll get the necessary paperwork together and then you’ll leave town with your newborn son.” His face clouded a bit. “I wish—” Shaking his head, he chuckled without a trace of mirth. “Oh, well, you know what they say about wishes and beggars. As part of the deal, I’m giving you ten thousand dollars.”

“Oh, no—”

“For the child. It will be expensive at first.” He saw the questions in her eyes. “It’s not from me. The maternal grandfather wants to be sure that the baby is cared for properly. If you don’t need the cash now, you can always buy bonds—think about the future, college or a house or whatever.” He waved off her concerns but she felt sick inside. Adding money into the deal gave it a darker, more corrupt hue.

“So the grandfather is financing all this?”

“You might not approve of it, Kate, but you should look at it as a gift. No one’s twisting your arm,” he reminded her. “What would you like to call him?”


“He’ll need a name.”

“Oh, Lord. I don’t know. How about Jon? Jonathan Rudisill Summers.”

“Clever girl,” he commented. “Your maiden name and Jim’s.” He smiled to himself.

“How will I know that no one will ever contact me? Want the boy back?”

“You have my word.”

He slid the envelope that had held the photograph in it across the desk. “Here’s the rest of the cash.”

“I don’t want the money.”

“Take it, Kate. Look, you’re going into this with your eyes open, but you’ve got to promise to practically fall off the face of the earth and no matter what, pretend that the baby is yours.”

She swallowed back her last, lingering doubts and picked up the bulky manila envelope. “I will,” she vowed because somewhere in this city an innocent newborn boy lay in a bed alone and frightened. He needed her.

And God only knew how much she needed him.,A riveting blend of mystery and romance; sensuality and suspense…the story of a woman living a shocking deception, and a stranger with his own sinful secrets to hide…